Piety
by hateKYEfever
Summary: sequel to DEVOTION, read this last. Natsuki needs to fight her demons, too.. then help Shizuru in the process...


DISCLAIMER: I don't own MaiHime

A/N: This a sequel to Devotion. Read that first. Thank you!

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Piety

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It had been going on these past few months. My frequent visits to your place never really made any difference. You seemed more and more withdrawn and that is not really what I was expecting.

All the more reason to try a bit harder today.

A simple knock on your door would have been enough. You always knew if it was me or just some annoying guest. But tonight was different.

_I noticed that the more I hug you, the more your eyes dulled. Still you smile that uncanny smile of yours. _

_You love me, yes. And I also love you._

_But what is this, Shizuru?_

You come a little late in answering the door. The flicker of love is still there, based from the uncontrollable glint in those eyes. You don't hate me. That much I am sure of. And your love has not faltered- not once.

_Then, what is this?_

I always knew it would be hard. But never knew it would be **THIS** hard. And complicated.

_But I want you._

I've done almost all the actions, all the sweet things I know that could make up for my stupidity. Was it too much? Where is that all-knowing yet bashful grin you often show me? Where is it?

No need for questions now. My words never did made any sense to you has it?

You come close to me and I did not waver. As soon as your lips touched mine, the memories of that day wheeled in.

I remembered the way I hurried to get to you. I was too stupid, saying that I was in a hurry because I don't want to be seen rushing to your place. I was in a hurry because I might not get you in time.

But you never moved, you never did distance yourself to me. Knowing that made me rush to you even more.

Your kisses became softer now, more tentative, more reluctant. I held you in place. You're fading again.

_Don't… Shizuru…_

That night went too fast, I guess. Your face was laden with pain as you saw me come up to you. You never asked for any explanation why I was there, in the rain. You never asked for anything and just accepted what you saw. I only realized one thing.

You really wanted to be mine.

And so after I said I love you, I just did the next thing I wanted to do. Kiss you.

Like right now.

Up until now all that had ever happened was what I wanted. I never did understand, haven't I, Shizuru…?

Prying my eyes open, I look at you and realized that it won't be too long till everything I've tried to put back to pieces with just meager emotion would be ruined. It paralyzed me; your tears. I never understood them.

Back then, when I fought you, you also did not understand me. I honestly thought you would but—

Your hands moved up to gently clutch at my bare shoulder. I wanted to concentrate on you. But something is not right and I can't just let this happen. No. Not with you pained like that.

It's too much for you, isn't it? No matter how many I love you's I say or how many smiles I give, you will still be in pain.

_What is it, Shizuru? What is making you so darn hurt?_

You gave yourself to me – nonetheless. Completely. It never made much sense before, but now I also feel the urge of giving you myself as much. I no longer know myself, really.

But I still know you.

Or do I?

I felt myself draw in your scent. I even decided that if I could go back, I'd redo things; honestly I would. Then maybe this pain you're feeling now, the pain that even my kisses cannot wipe away, would long be gone.

If I could call the rain to wash away your pain that dreadful day of rejection, I would, my love…

It surprised me when I felt your warmth had left my side and I woke up without your breath grazing my face. It alarmed me to see you sitting there, dreamlike. I sincerely thought I was the one dreaming. I called, but got no reply.

Should I? Somehow I begin to doubt whether you still need me or not.

Damn!

Just the thought of you leaving me scared me to death.

You are not going anywhere, Shizuru! Reject me now, but I will never ever let go of you… Never again.

The mere thought of it pushed me. I came in closer, reached for you and once you were of contact, I couldn't help but whisper sweet nothings to you. I had to say what I feel – all of it! I had to make you stay. I had to feel how real your emotions are for me!

"Natsuki… Please…"

Your voice never failed to make my heart skip a beat. But tonight, it sounded just a little to clear for comfort. You still need me -- needed me… So much…

But your eyes… are showing something else… something more… I searched closer… and closer… and it bit me. HARD.

It dawned on me; the fear of you thinking – no – feeling that…

Oh my God!

You thought that you've only been answered by an empty shell. You really thought this was one-sided, huh?

Ah… I'm so sorry my Shizuru…

I held you close and hushed your whimper. You are just like that Shizuru. So giving… It's a mystery why I had just noticed now that my words felt empty for you. And your fears had been craftily hidden behind those wondrous crimson orbs. It washed over me, and I can't help but feel a little bit amused.

I doubt, you doubt.

I waver, you waver.

We both have our demons, Shizuru… We are so different yet eerily suited to match each other…

So I need you to know, that there's nothing wrong with telling me that you wanted more than just my scanty declarations of love.

"N-Natsuki…?" You look at me searchingly, holding me too tight.

_Making sure I'm not just a dream, ne?_

For the first time, for the very first time ever since I thought I made it clear that I love you, I smiled a happy knowing smile.

"Shizuru… I am here… Don't be afraid… I love you…"

I close the gap and as always, I lose myself in your warmth. This might take awhile but now I know how to love you better. I want to relieve you of your misery my love.

So, please… Let me…

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FIN

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A/N: Hehe.. You guys have to read Devotion first. I thank the following for reviewing it:

ALEXISSA2: Wouldn't it be great if you had the same devotion as Shiz, then be answered in the same manner by Nat? Hope this fic made it happen...And thanks for reading my other works...

Ruka : thanks a lot for reading my humble work...

kikyo4ever: Retribution for our beloved Shizuru-sama! lol

Kinslayer Nara: I enjoyed writing this, so I may have messed up, because I was really too excited in having Natsuki return all the love to Shizuru.. hehe..

chatterbox-hikaru13: I love my angst! hehehe.. But I love a happy Shizuru more.. Here it is... ittadakimasu!

A/N: Thanks in advance for those who would review and/or just read...Reviews are always welcome!

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